Krati: Can we please learn a little bit about what brought you to entrepreneurship and what that phase was like – deciding to go all in, quitting your job? What was that like?
Emily: Yeah, so this was about 10 years ago or so, and I discovered the world of coaching and I had just gotten out of a five year quarter life crisis where I had no clue what I wanted to do with my life. I had turned down the opportunity to go to grad school. I had moved thousands of miles away from Ohio to London, England, which is a whole other story in itself, but I discovered the world of coaching and I had this kind of lightning bolt experience where it just hit me that this was what I was meant to do. And I’d been searching so long for something that felt exciting. And so when I discovered coaching in the online space, in particular, people like Marie Forleo and Danielle Laporte, who are big in our industry, I just saw what was possible and I was able to.
So, I think that’s one of the first steps with entrepreneurship is you see yourself in somebody else or you see someone doing something that resonates with you. And even if you don’t have 100% belief in yourself, you can see that it’s possible for somebody else. And so I kept observing those people and ultimately decided to jump into a business building coaching program to learn how to start my business. And things did take off pretty quickly. Within my first 18 months, I had a seven figure business. And we can go into that for sure, because there’s so much more to the story than that and you know, month by month, as I was making more money, I realized, you know what, I could turn my annual salary as a matchmaker.
I was very part time in that job, but it was about 30, 000 a year. I could turn that amount into my monthly income as a coach. And so honestly, it was a no brainer. I didn’t have much responsibility. I didn’t have kids. I was newly married. I didn’t own a home. And so for me, it wasn’t a big decision. I just knew that I wanted to have all the time I could possibly muster for my coaching business versus splitting my time with something else.
Krati: That makes sense but had you had kids by that time, would you still have gone all in? I’m just trying to like get a sense of how deeply invested you were. Or was it something you thought, let me try this on for size.
Emily: Yeah, I mean, I was deeply invested for sure, and of course, I’ve worked with thousands of women around the world at this point, and I can envision what it would be like to have, now I’m a new mother, so having a child and you know, being in that place would have been completely different. And I’ve seen a lot of people, they have their jobs, their nine to five job or whatever it is, that’s bringing in the money.
They have that on the side while they’re building their business. And so if I had been in that scenario, that’s what I would have done. I still would have been all in. I would have made it work. And I think there’s something really amazing about your job or whatever the thing is that’s bringing in the revenue, funding your dreams.
And I think so often people think that they have to throw in the towel and you know, it has to happen really fast. And I’m actually going to be recording an episode of my own about how I hit seven figures in 18 months because I have people asking me about that all the time and I wouldn’t necessarily recommend going that fast.
Like it doesn’t have to happen in that way. And I spent a lot of money and took a ton of risks. And it was super stressful in many ways. And so if that’s not your current kind of life reality, you don’t have to do it that way. But I like to share my story because, you know, both sides of the spectrum are possible.
Krati: If somebody has the kind of personality where people are afraid of risks or they don’t know how to handle failure. Would you recommend entrepreneurship as a path for them?
Emily: I think you can get there. So much about entrepreneurship is transforming your mindset because most people aren’t brought up to think like an entrepreneur. So you have to become that person and no one likes failure. Of course not. We fail and things, you know, every single day, though, it’s not just starting a business or running a business that includes failure.
So you do have to quickly get comfortable with challenges and get excited when things don’t work out in the sense that you’re getting information, you’re getting lessons, you can take things and tweak it. And that’s a completely different mindset. Because, of course, we’re taught that hard equals success.
Bad challenge equals bad, but that’s not the truth of entrepreneurship in particular. And so I really, in life, really, there’s so many challenges in life that steer us in the right direction or open up our eyes to a new possibility. And so if you can start to transform your mindset. and become that person who thinks like an entrepreneur, everything will be much easier and you’ll be able to be on the path for the long haul, not just, you know, be in and out.
Krati: Yeah. I think some qualities will come when they are most needed, I think because this path is so unknown and every challenge is so unique for each individual. But what qualities do you think someone has to have from the get go?
Emily: Tenacity, bravery for sure and an ability to continue to move on and to test and try new things. I had a podcast guest on my show. She said, hustle is not for a lifetime, but it is for a season. And I think so often we are adverse to hustle and it’s just, it’s really challenging to build something new if you don’t have the time to put into it.
And so that may require you to hustle. When I was building my business in the beginning, I was working 80 to a hundred hours a week. Now, did I plan on working like that forever? Absolutely not. But I loved what I was doing, and like I said, I didn’t have kids. I didn’t have things that took up my time necessarily.
I know that’s not everyone’s path, but really think about it. You know, are you going to dedicate the time it needs to get this thing off the ground? There’s an amazing metaphor that the plane uses the majority of its fuel as it’s taking off, right? And so you have to be able to generate the energy to be able to devote to this thing to get it off the ground.
Again, it’s not going to be like that forever, but not everyone is willing to do that.
Krati: Right. Okay. That makes sense. And I love that you’ve said that because you know, anytime CEOs of big companies, people who, you know, we want to learn from, how did they make it, whenever they say, Oh, work life balance is a myth people like Tim Cook, people like Sundar Pichai, Ratan Tata who even today, he works so hard despite his age. Elon Musk, this is like the most recent thing that we’ve learned about him, that he works like crazy, crazy hours.
And anytime these people share their advice and they, they say things like work life balance is a myth for someone who is trying to make it to the top. There is no such thing as work life balance. They’re always accused of promoting toxic work culture. So. I’m guessing you don’t agree with that. You said that hustle has to happen for at least a season so you can make it, what changes after that?
Emily: Yeah, no, great question. And I mean, I think obviously there are different scenario for everyone but in my case, that meant having more team come in, it meant just more support all around. And you make a decision, like if you want to have Elon Musk type results, and you’re that obsessed. with what you’re doing, you know, your life is going to look different to somebody who, you know, wants a part time business.
It’s like comparing apples to oranges, right? Like we need to get clear on what your goals actually are and what your desires are for your life because it’s going to look different for everyone. And so, you know, I’ve made some conscious decisions over the last few years about what I want my business to look like.
And for me, it wasn’t sustainable to work 80-100 hours a week forever and that’s not what I wanted. And so I think, there are different chapters in business. I think that sometimes it can be so tempting to look at the whole big picture and try and figure out how you’re going to make it happen but honestly, especially when you’re first starting out and even in the first few years, just take it like month by month or 90 days at a time.
You don’t need to overwhelm yourself with how this is going to be 10 years from now. And the truth is most industries are changing so quickly all the time. It’s not actually worth it to try and make a plan that far in advance. So I think just take it, you know, step by step.
Krati: Do you believe that we can have it all or if we know our priorities very clearly, we can accordingly structure our life and therefore our business as well and have what we need the most and then a little bit less of the second thing, like whatever it is that’s second on the list of priorities.
Do you think we have to make a compromise like that?
Emily: I do believe you can have it all and it might be different degrees of each thing, right? Like there might be some weeks where you’re completely devoted to your business, you’re in a launch, you’re doing something big and so you don’t see your family as much and then things shift, right? And so it doesn’t need to be like all or nothing. We can have ebbs and flows, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not gonna, you know, have a family because my business exists. Like, that was important to me. And so getting clear on your desires, just like you said, I use the word desires when it comes to clarity and our goals. Getting clear on what you really desire for your life and acknowledging that that’s your truth and that’s what’s meant for you and then figuring out how do I piece everything together so that I do have that and what does it look like.
I don’t think looking at something as a sacrifice is healthy. There are things that you have to change or maybe give up or whatever, but I always get on board with that.
Like, I always get to the place where I’m in acceptance of that and it feels good and I know why I’m doing it. And I think inherently the word sacrifice feels really negative to people and they feel like there, there’s a loss there but get yourself to the mindset of this is not a loss, this is actually a gain and I’m consciously making a decision to do something different, to let something go or whatever it is and that feels good to me.
Like I think getting to that place feels so much better than, Oh my gosh, I’m so upset that I’m letting something go. And it feels, you know, terrible to me. I feel like I’m not getting the life that I want. Like remove that and focus on the thing that you are gaining.
Krati: Yeah, that’s such a healthy approach. Thank you so much for sharing that and I do agree with you. Like, I would give up a full night’s sleep to take care of my parents if they need me but if I had to drive a drunk friend home, that would piss me off.
So yeah, this approach, it accommodates your priorities. It accommodates also your value system. If you value your family more than your business, you’ll be happy to cut down on your working hours so that you can be there for your family.
Emily: Yeah and everyone’s version of being there for their family is different. So if this one off, you go and pick up your parents in the middle of the night, but you realise, you know what, this is happening all the time, and it’s affecting my business, taking care of your parents could be paying for someone to help them when you’re not able to be there.
We think that there’s like this one size fits all approach, but you can achieve both things, work on your business and care for your family. It just might look different compared to someone else’s scenario.
Krati: Yeah. And this is where what you recommended, like having clarity around what it is that you want out of life will help. Because then you can figure out how you want to do it once you know what you want done. I think that helps. Okay, so you talked about like when you looked at the coaching industry, you wanted to be a part of it.
You looked at Marie Forleo. You looked at all of these really, really successful coaches who had already made it. Were you sure that you’ll succeed? Like, I would like to know what was going on in your mind, and how did you psych yourself into actually taking the leap?
Because I know initially, I read some of your story, and you had some debt, you were venturing out into the complete unknown, and the first month wasn’t so great. But yeah, things started to change pretty quickly for you, but still, it was very much an unknown territory for you.
So I would like to know a little bit more about that.
Emily: Yeah. So when I started my business, I was 30, 000 in credit card debt and 90, 000 in student loan debt and so it wasn’t like I had, you know, a big investor or a savings account, or even like I said earlier, a job that paid me a ton of money to fund this. Like I had to do it myself. So the first program I invested in, it was terrifying because it was 2,000, but I did the payment plan.
I think it was $197 a month and, but I just knew that I couldn’t do this on my own. I knew that I needed the support. I needed the resources to be able to know how to build a business. I was college educated. I had a degree in psychology. I eventually did go and get a masters and so I knew that, you know, I just needed help because I couldn’t expect myself to have all the answers right away.
So I invest in this business, in this, coaching program. It was B school from Marie Forleo and did that for six months or so. And, um, in July 2014, I made 442 in my business, which obviously is not a lot, but I was excited about that first sale and I was like, okay, it’s really going to happen. Um, a few months later I invested in another program.
My husband actually lent me his credit card to sign up because it was 7, 500. And I got into that program and I started to understand marketing and I started to attract more clients. And at the time, Facebook ads were like 60 cents a lead or something crazy like that. And so I did those really quickly and I was getting a lot of calls.
In fact, I had 54 sales calls in a row, but the only problem was every single person said no to me. And so, during that time, luckily, because I was in this coaching program, I was working with somebody directly. I got on a call with her, it was a group call, and I was like, this is not working. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, but like, this is not happening.
And I was making a couple thousand dollars a month at that point, but not enough to be able to leave my job, because I was living in London at the time. Like I said, had a lot of debt and all the things. And she basically talked me through it. She talked me down off the ledge and she was like, you know, you can do this.
And we uncovered the root of the problem, which was me not knowing how to sell and not knowing how to have sales conversations. And I can talk more about that in a second, but really like I knew that there were other people doing what I wanted to do I just had to figure out the recipe I had to figure out how to get it to work for me And like I said in the beginning sometimes other people can be so impactful for our journey because when we don’t have belief in ourself, or we don’t see it working for us, we can look to them and be like, you know what, this is humanly possible. I just need to figure it out.
But that’s a mindset that you have to cultivate. You can’t just throw in the towel when it feels like things aren’t working. I remember one of my coaches, he said, you’re like a pot on the stove about to boil. You know, when a stove, the water’s heating up, you can’t see the bubbles right away, but eventually they come.
And I really held on to that. Like I am a pot on the stove about to boil. I am that water. And so I just kept, you know, doing my mindset work, telling myself these things, trusting that I was going to make it happen. And honestly, I had no fallback plan so I had to make it happen. Those were the beginning months of my business and once I learned about sales and how to really uncover my own money blocks and move past those, everything started to change.
Krati: Okay. So it’s safe to say that the belief ebbs and flows, but you have to maintain it more on the upper side and have support.
Okay, I have to ask, a lot of such people do manifestation. They are very hell bent on thinking positively and maintaining optimism, positive self worth.
Did you do any such thing? Or had any rituals at the time?
Emily: Oh yeah, I mean, I had a huge mindset practice and I can talk about that. The only thing that I would say that people need to understand is that manifesting is nothing without action.
And so, you know, I did all the mindset stuff. So I used to lay in the shower and listen to this 20 minute audio that had like a bunch of money mantras to start to transform my money mindset because I realised I had a lot of blocks in that area.
I read The Secret. I was writing lists about all the things that I desire. You know, I was journaling. I was doing all the stuff. I was working with a coach who specialised in mindset. And so that is so, so important. And the reason why mindset’s so important is of course you visualize it. You visualize things, you see yourself there. You get in that frame of mind, but it also inspires you to take the action and to put yourself out there. And so I always tell people like success is not just about going to a mountaintop and meditating.
You have to actually come down at some point and take the steps. to build the thing and put yourself out there. And so for me, it’s always that combination of manifest error of mindset work plus action. That’s what manifesting really is. And you know, our minds are so, so powerful. They’re going to help us create a new reality.
But in my opinion, that’s only because you generate the belief in yourself, and maybe the idea comes to you, and then you put pen to paper and you actually take the action and take the steps required.
Krati: I love that. Okay, I have to ask, marketing is difficult. We all believe that there is a certain kind of personality that it takes to crack marketing. So as someone who had gone into this area without actually having had any experience. What was that journey like and getting good with marketing?
Because you went from making 442 to having like a six figure month eventually in the first six months of your business, which is incredible. What was that like? And how did you like, again, crack the marketing code?
Emily: Yeah, so like I said, Facebook ads were pretty cheap back in the day, and so that was very useful. But one of the things that I first did was, tele classes. So before there was Zoom, we had something called Instant Tele-seminar, and so I would get on these calls. I would teach people and then pitch my services.
And there was a point before that where I was obviously really nervous about putting myself out there. I kept having all those nos. But one of the things that really shifted for me was I recognized that sales was actually in service to somebody. It was my duty to tell them about the thing that I had that could help them, especially in the coaching space.
Like your job is to help people. And so if I’m keeping all that to myself, that doesn’t help anyone. My company doesn’t continue. No one knows what I offer. No one is served. Nothing, you know, nothing transforms. And so when I started to approach marketing and sales with that frame of mind, everything shifted and I realized it was so much bigger than me and it was about the client.
And so I think so many people are like, I want to get them to purchase. I want to get to the sale. I want to, you know, just get on a call with someone and use my mindset work to get them to say yes. And I know that, it can be tricky in the beginning and it can feel really scary to put yourself out there.
But if you switch that frame of mind and realise it’s not just about you, then you know, everything will change. And that’s essentially what a business is. Like it’s insert your, you’re helping someone with something, you’re solving a problem. And so it’s your duty to put yourself out there. And there was a period, like I said, when I had all those nos in a row.
And so one of my coaches, she really helped me shift that. And she said, you know what, you’re going to slice your prices. You’re gonna take 50% off your prices and I want you to sell 10 packages and you’re not gonna focus on anything else. That’s all you’re gonna talk about. That’s all you’re gonna market.
Because I think so often we wanna do all the things and trust me, I’m the queen of that but I had to get good at one thing, really, like pretty quickly. I had to get good at something. One thing, focus on that. I had to make sure that people understood exactly what it was that I was selling and what I was doing.
So I sold those 10 packages, then immediately raised my rates and raise them again and so on and so forth. But I think in the beginning, like get good at one thing, get good at talking at one thing, get good at putting yourself out there and recognise that marketing and sales is in service to your customer.
Krati: So many good notes there. How many hours had you already put into trying to make a sale and how many rejections had you had by that point?
Emily: Well, so the first month I made 442. The next month was around 1, 500 and that was a couple of like small packages like one off sessions. Same thing again for the next month. Then I had my first 6k month, four months in and that was the month that I decided to quit my job and go all in. And you know between that sort of period I had had you know, like 60 sales calls, some like I said, had a few yeses in the beginning for something that was for packages that were really small, but like 60 sales calls. So that’s at least 60 hours just doing calls. But I was getting up at four in the morning to work on my business before going to my actual job. Then I was coming home working from like 4 pm till 11 on my business. And so, you know, that was like every single day. And I remember my husband and I always joke about how so many, he went to so many things where I would stay for an hour and then I would go home. Or I wouldn’t even show up. And everyone’s like, where is, where’s Emily? But I realised I was like, I don’t, these parties aren’t important to me.
Launching my business is important to me and fulfilling my dreams is important to me. I’m going to throw way better parties whenever I have money, my business takes off. And so I was just in a different like frame of mind and was very obsessed with making this happen. So honestly, I could try and do the math, but it was, it was many, many, many hours and many days like that to get this off the ground.
Krati: Yeah, I think I get that point. So getting really good at that one thing, like selling, the knowledge that you had serving the person on the other end of that call and really making it about them helped you unlock the next stage in your journey at that point. Okay. Uh, and. You made the first, uh, like the six figures that you had and.
But before that had happened, you had to slice your pricing. That’s what your mentor told you to do. So a lot of the coaches now advise aspiring coaches or aspiring entrepreneurs who are selling products or whatever, the advice that comes their way is that you have to make your product into something premium.
If you charge them high prices and you believe in it, they’ll buy but what if someone’s new to the industry and they have never made sales before. Do you think that’s a good strategy for them?
Emily: The key that you just said there is you have to believe in it And so oftentimes what I see people do Is they try and charge really high rates or whatever they consider to be high But they don’t have the confidence to back it up. So that’s what my coach realised at the time. She realised I wasn’t actually confident in my price point because I had had so many nos in a row that I had gotten sort of down in the dumps in terms of what I was selling and I didn’t feel confident.
And so she recognised that in me and we basically did a bit of an exercise, which I do for my clients all the time, where we tuned into where I was energetically in terms of the price point. So where did I feel confident? And for me at the time, it was 1,500 for a 90 day coaching package.
I had originally had it at 3000. So 1500 is what we started with. And so I would say, ask yourself first and foremost, where are you energetically when you get on a call with somebody, what feels like a total no brainer price to you, and you don’t want to go as far as, you know, selling something that you’re going to resent the client for, because it’s way too cheap, but where is that happy medium where it might be a little bit and I think again, it’s not a one size fits all approach. There are people selling million dollar packages. There are people selling thousand dollar packages. And so you decide where you are in the spectrum. And once you make that one sale or two or three or whatever, at that price point, your confidence level is going to increase and then you raise your prices and so on and so forth.
Krati: And now like revisiting those days in your memory, I’m sure there must have been so many elements because as someone who’s also like, started from scratch and built a business into something. There are so many little pieces that occupy your time, like the branding, marketing, how are you going to pitch yourself?
How are you going to show up in the world? Which one occupied a lot of time with you? Which one do you wish you had not invested so much of yourself into at that point?
Emily: Wow. That’s a great question. I’ve never thought about that. I will say one of the things that stands out to me is at one point I had 27 one to one clients, and I was running two group programs and trying to build a course. And this is why I said at the beginning that, you know, I’m happy to share my story, but I also recognise that not everyone has the time in their schedule for that much. And I wouldn’t have done it that way looking back necessarily. Like I didn’t need to take on 27 one to one clients. But you have to understand like I was investing heavily in my business. So as I said to you before, I started with a 2, 000 program. Then my husband let me his credit card for 7, 500.
Then as I started making more money, I invested in something that was 25, 000. Then I got an invitation from my coach to join her top, top program and that was 120,000 and so I invested in that program right when I had made six figures in my business. So all my money was going to Facebook ads to getting support from coaches to really understanding how to do this.
And so I had to be able to pay for the things that I was investing in. And so for me, that meant taking on a lot of clients. Now, again, do I, did I need to do that at that speed? No, not everyone needs to do it that way, but that’s how I chose to do it and so looking back, I might have taken a slower path.
I might have not put so much on my plate and felt like I had this. You know desire and need to do it so quickly, but that’s also got me where I am today So I think it’s just deciding like how much do you want on your plate? How quickly do you want to move and that kind of dictates everything else because there isn’t you know one way to do this.
There’s not a straight path towards your goals
Krati: Okay. Do you think coaching, having mentors, that’s an essential to success?
Emily: I do. Yeah. And again, you don’t need to invest at the level I invested in, but get some sort of training because I mean, if you think about it, there are so many things that we have education on and yet, when we started a business, we’re like, I’m going to figure it out on my own. Like that does not make any sense whatsoever.
And even if you just have a support system, like a group or someone who supports you when There are those tough moments that are bound to happen. Like that’s going to be a game changer because you’ll keep moving forward. So I always think, you know, what it like, yes, there’s a cost. There might be like a physical investment involved, but what is the cost of you not having that support and not having that guidance? Most of the time that the second is so much greater.
Krati: Okay. I got your point completely and I know with the story that you’ve shared that point stands out that when you were on the ledge, your mentor, your coaches talked you off it and actually got you to a good mental space. But to someone who does not have the money to afford it, do you think books and podcasts would be adequate replacement for it and a Facebook community perhaps?
Emily: Yeah, do what you can. And I will say that one of my core beliefs is that we always have the money and people might not agree with that. But let me explain. So when I just started my business, like I told you, I had all of that debt. I didn’t know how I was going to pay for these programs. And so I was brave enough to ask my husband who, by the way, was only making 36, 000 a year.
I asked my husband if I could borrow his credit card and he lent me the money. Not everyone has a husband, I get that. Not everyone has parents they can borrow from, but I believe if we entertain the desire of wanting to hire a coach or wanting to do something, we get creative about how to make it happen.
The issue that I see most people having is they immediately go to, Oh no, I can’t afford it. And then of course, that closes off any possibility of them actually being able to afford it. They don’t get creative about how they could bring in the money. Like you could sell something, you could sell something physical that you actually already have.
You could sell a package, you could put yourself out there quicker. Because honestly, like transformation, it’s never about the money. It’s about who you become in the process to the thing. And I always tell my clients like, So much of your transformation is literally just signing up for this program because you automatically put yourself into a different category.
You’re automatically, you know, putting out there. This is non negotiable for me. I’m making this happen. I’m investing. This is important to me. So just even like inner, look, uncover all the stones podcast, you’re going to have to figure out how to make money off of it, And if you can’t, then of course, use the podcast, the free master class, the Facebook group as tools to get you to the next level.
Krati: Okay. So there are a lot of approaches to entrepreneurship because, you know, entrepreneurship in itself, the word can mean so many things because there are so many types of industries and there’s always a different approach. Then there’s your personality also, what works best for you. So how far do we prioritise authenticity?
That’s the new fad word doing the rounds and everyone’s talking about authenticity, but for someone who’s stepping into this world for the first time, there is something to be said for all the expertise on offer. And as you said, like working with coaches is a very, very good way of fast tracking your progress.
So where does authenticity fit into it? And what does that look like for someone starting that journey?
Emily: Wow, you aske the best questions. I love it. Yeah, that’s such a great question. So for me, what I always talk to my clients about was sprinkling a bit of yourself into what it is that you’re doing, and so I think, that there are some layed out paths that you can take and it’s easy to like the best way to fast track what you’re doing is to learn from someone who’s done it before like I really do believe that so just like if we have a Personal trainer, they might have a way to support you in reaching your goals And of course you lean into okay.
Well, what feels good to me? Do I like yoga or do I like running do I like Pilates? Do I like spinning? And so they can help you customize what it is that they’re doing But there’s still like a path that you take in a recommended way of doing things And so I always like the combination like i’ll tell you exactly what worked for me And let’s customize this so it feels aligned for you.
It does feel authentic. And then we find a way to mold this so it fits with you and your lifestyle. And you know, I, to your point, I do agree that being authentic is one of the best ways to get noticed and for people to really connect with you and feel like they know you and want to work with you or buy from you. And so I do think that’s really important, but that is, you know, one piece of the puzzle.
Krati: Right. I will share this though. Anytime I’ve made a decision that was more about what someone else thinks I should do and that made me go against my own instincts. I’ve had to undo those decisions because, and they cost me a lot of money. And anytime I leaned into, as I’m talking about this, I mean, mean creative decisions, how I want to show up in my business, how I want to present myself.
When those decisions are concerned, the creative stuff, I, whenever I lean into my authenticity, it always worked out for me. So that’s, I wanted to go a little deeper into that. So when it comes to technicality and logistics of how something gets done, do you think it’s better in those cases to consult someone who knows more than we do, and then it comes to creativity?
Is it better to walk your own path?
Emily: Well, a good coach will help you with both. So that’s why I start with desires for my clients and like really understand what it is that they want and who they are. And it’s not like a one size fits all approach. Again, like I said, I’m going to tell you how I did it, but if that feels really sucky to you and you know, it’s more than just, Oh, I’m scared of putting myself out there online.
Like it really is like, this is not the right path for me. We identify that and we figure it out together because you’re totally right. Like, why would I want someone to build a business that feels terrible for them and feels inauthentic? It’s going to be like crash and burn. They’re going to do it for a few days or a few months or years, and then it’s not going to feel aligned and they’re going to throw in the towel.
And so to your point, like our intuition, it’s. So, so powerful. And if we follow that and follow the things that light us up, of course, we’re going to be more successful. And so I don’t think it’s as black and white as like consult with somebody for the tech or the step by step processes. I think it’s find somebody who helps you.
To get clarity on all of it who you are and who you want to be how you want to run your business What’s authentic to you and also has knowledge of what’s working in the industry? And you get to say, you know I’m gonna i’m gonna take it and run with it or you get to say you know what that’s not for me But I do think people need to understand When it’s a moment of fear and a block that’s stopping them from doing something or when it’s, and when it’s actually like their truth and it’s not authentic to them.
And I think the water is very muddy for people around that and you know, a big theme of this conversation has been finding clarity and that there’s so much power in clarity. So when you have self awareness and clarity of what’s a real fear and what’s not. That will be super helpful for you. And so I think really understanding yourself to a deep degree is essential for success.
Krati: Okay, that helps. There are a lot of theories on money blocks, so many books on the subject, but I don’t think people, right away, understand how to even identify and spot a block like that and how to then work through it because this conditioning goes way back.
And it’s so deeply ingrained in us that often be it’s like an extension of us. We don’t see it for what it is. And even when we do, we’re working so hard on our business for figuring things out in such unknown territory, and then to work on these money blocks and stay conscious of them all the time.
That seems a very complicated process to do.
Emily: You’re not making this sound very fun. So first for people who don’t understand your money mindset. That is essentially what your beliefs and thoughts are about money. And like you said, this is passed down from generations. It’s not just, oh, I woke up thinking about money in this way.
You’ve been taught to think about money in a certain way and especially when we do something different, like starting a business, we have to retrain and reprogram our mind, just like you would reprogram a computer or update the software and so when people get into business, especially when it comes to sales and pricing and all of those things, it can be really difficult.
I know for me, one of my biggest struggles was this belief around it’s not okay to talk about money and so when I was getting on these 54 sales calls in a row, people would be like, oh yeah, I really want to work with you, but I don’t have the money. And so what I realized after many calls of saying, okay, no problem, bye.
What I needed to go deeper with them because number one, it was in service to them for me to go deeper. And number two, I wasn’t going to have a business for very much longer if I didn’t get comfortable talking about sales and money. And so what I would do is I would ask them, okay, well, you know, totally hear you.
But can I help you find the money? And of course, no one’s going to say no to that. And so right there on the phone, we would go deeper into their finances, into where they could find the money to start their business or kick off their dreams. And we would get creative with it. Much like I described a few minutes ago, just getting creative about how we could bring in the money.
And even that alone created such a big shift because people realised, Oh, I have a savings account or, Oh, I have a 401k or, Oh, I could borrow money from dad or mom or whoever. Or, Oh, I could sell this thing or, you know, whatever it is. And so they were open to finding the money, which was a shift for them.
And obviously helped me because more people were able to say yes. So that’s just one example, but what you can do is look throughout your daily life and just. Observe yourself how, observe yourself thinking about money. So another example could be oftentimes I encourage people, if they’re taking a flight somewhere, to upgrade to first class.
And you wouldn’t believe the amount of pushback I get on that request. Because people have so much emotion around first class. Sometimes it’s like, I can’t afford it. Other times it’s like, Oh no, that’s a waste of money. That’s way too frivolous. Or what would my parents think? What would people think if I was sitting in first class?
And again, another silly example, but there are examples all the time throughout our life about how we spend our money, what we think is deserving of our money. How, you know, like, do you shop organic or do you have this belief that, you know, you’re not worthy of organic foods or that’s frivolous or I don’t have the money.
And so when I was first doing this work, I would challenge myself to buy certain things that were on my desires list, like buy myself flowers once a week or go and take the yoga class. Like we don’t need to spend thousands upon thousands of dollars, but just start stepping into your desires and. See how it feels because most people aren’t even allowing themselves to go there.
They’re not allowing themselves to spend the money on things that they just want because they want it. But start, you can start small, small, but start with that and see how it feels and then you can build up from there.
Krati: Okay. All right. That sounds pretty cool. So basically indulge yourself every once in a while.
Emily: Yeah, and be the observer, like look at it as an experiment. So what happens when you go and buy the flowers for yourself? Is it like, Oh, I’m not worthy of this. These are going to die in three days. This isn’t a good thing to spend money on. I know that when I was living in London every once in a while, I would take a taxi.
And that for me, I was like, like when I had first moved there, I moved flats and I dragged four suitcases, literally 20 minutes down the street to my next. flat up four flights of stairs instead of paying for help, right? Like that’s a money mindset issue. There’s, there’s stuff going on there beneath the surface.
And so observe how you’re spending money and how you’re not spending money. See how your family and your friends talk about money because that’s going to impact you as well and when you’re in the place of starting a business, it’s so important that. You observe without judgment, right? It’s not your fault that you are where you are.
It’s not your fault that you’re thinking the way you’re thinking like that is programming, but it can be changed and ask yourself how would a successful person think about this in this moment? And if you don’t know, get in the room with them, get in a group with them, hire them, ask them because there is a way of thinking about things that will get you the results that you want.
Krati: Okay. I love it and what would this whole exercise look like for someone who cares less about money and more about creating something on their own, because I know that’s one of the motivations for getting into entrepreneurship.
Emily: If you’re in a business, money has to be a priority because you’re running a business, not a charity shop. And so when you start with the place, start from a place of desire. What I did is I made my list of all the things, you know, and it could be that you are really charitable and you actually want to have the money to start a charity or you want to be able to give back, or you want to have scholarships or whatever, whatever the motivation is.
Put a list of your desires together and then put a monetary amount next to them because money loves a purpose. And so having clarity around how much money you need to grow your business, to hire a team, like it’s a blessing to be able to bring on team members and to help them pay for their livelihood, right?
It doesn’t mean that you just want money to have money sitting in the bank or to buy the biggest house or the best car, but there are things you can do for money. With money that will give back and so get clear around like what is your purpose for the money? And if you want your business to be successful and thrive then money needs to be coming in Otherwise, it’s not sustainable And so like shift your mindset around that because I think that’s a belief in itself, right?
Like we think that the money’s all just for us, but there are so many other ways that you can use that.
Krati: Love, love that. That’s exactly what my experience has been. As someone who went into it not prioritising money, I suffered for it because someone had to make, had to move the money to my priority list perhaps not to the top of it but to the top three and give me a reason for that that worked for me Particularly because I don’t care about shopping, but I love traveling and I travel I travel well I travel a lot of the time with my parents and they travel really freaking well That means I have to keep up with them unless I want them paying for me, which I do not I also when I see someone Like needing treatment that is, that can like going through something that can be fixed, but not having the money to fix it.
I want to help. And so my friends had to actually take me down to places where people were waiting for that kind of money to come in. Where their pain would just go away. It was that easy, but they just [00:43:00] didn’t have the money to make it happen. And they’re like, You can do this like make money and give it away.
It’s fine or make money and just spend it only on travel. Don’t buy fancy clothes if you don’t like it.
Basically what I’m sharing is, you are 100% right. I had to make money a priority. Or I was just haemorrhaging money, the money that I had, it was, it was starting to disappear. My savings was starting to disappear because I was not prioritizing money, which meant I was also not pricing my services right, which meant that the people who were coming in and booking with me were actually taking me for granted all the time.
Emily: Wow. Thank you for sharing that. It’s like, I always think of money as a relationship. And if I was just ignoring my husband or my daughter, like that would not be a very healthy relationship if I wasn’t valuing them, et cetera. And it’s the same thing with money. And so, like you said, you had to get clear on why this was actually important to you.
And that’s why it’s so powerful to start with your desires and what you want. First, and that doesn’t mean that it’s going to be like a list of, you know, selfish things, but I also don’t judge if you want to have a private jet. Awesome. Do it. If that fuels you amazing, do it. If you want to have a charity, awesome.
Have it all but like getting clear on your unique blueprint and what’s authentic to you is essential.
Krati: A lot of the millennials and Gen Z have a different approach to entrepreneurship. There’s a lot more of that self love, self care narrative which is valid but what advice would you give them, especially the Gen Z?
Emily: Well, I mean, I think self love has been one of those things that’s been a narrative of my life, and that I’m still trying to figure out for sure. But I think you have to ask yourself, like, what is the definition of that? Is it, you know, two hours of self care every morning or is it 20 minutes? And then you dive into your work because you know that your business is so important to you Like I think and to back up a little bit What is what is the result that you’re craving and how are you going to get there?
And you might not know until you start experimenting But for me, if the big desire is to make sure my business is successful, or maybe there’s multiple desires to have a, an amazing relationship with my partner to take care of my body and make sure my business is successful, then like, and are the tasks that I’m doing or how I’m spending my time fitting into those boxes, right?
Like get clear on that first and foremost. And it, Start to test it out. Like if you do a two hour morning routine and you practice extreme self care Do you have enough time for the other things to move the ball forward or move the needle rather? Or do we need to cut that back? So I don’t think it’s black and white And I think you definitely prioritize self care and self love, but like how you do that is going to be different for everyone based on the results that you want and based on your goals in other areas.
Krati: Okay, I love that. If you could speak to any other entrepreneur in the world, dead or alive, and ask them one question that they would give you completely honest answer to, who would that person be and what would that question be?
Emily: Oh man, I don’t know. I mean, I would love to meet Oprah Winfrey. Like that’s my, that would be my goal. And I’m not sure that I would be able to just ask her one question. I honestly, like, this might sound really selfish, but it’s okay. I’ve always had a dream of some sort of collaboration with Oprah.
And so I’d probably more so be likely to ask, like, can we collaborate on something? And because I feel like I can find the information, you know, with every, like, and I can see how she lives her life from the outside looking in. Of course, I could ask her more personal questions, but to your point, like, I need to do things in a way that’s authentic to me as well.
And so I’d be more likely to be like, what can we do together? How can I help your mission? Like, how can I be involved in what it is that you’re doing and figure out if there’s some sort of partnership that could happen there?
Krati: That would be pretty cool.